The “NO STRINGS ATTACHED” Type of Guy- PART 3

By Elizabeth Muriithi

So we are back at it again and today is the 3^rd stroke in this 4part continuing series about PLAYERS. At this point, I must say that compiling this article has not been any facile task as it may seem. What I gathered from all the interviews I conducted leading to this article left my eyes dry and my heart in shock as to the extent of savagery the female heart can endure and how cold some guys can be. Do they even have a heart? Today, we get a glimpse of the lives of some campus ladies who have been treated as FRIENDS, GIRLFRIENDS, WIVES and as SLAVES by sleaze bags they entrusted their hearts to; their boyfriends. Today, we will walk in their foot prints and get a feel of what it means to be taken for granted. So come along then, let’s walk.

Lisa* is a lass who is way too drop-dead gorgeous lass to even be called beautiful. I’m a girl alright, but when it comes to elegance, I have never seen a masterpiece quite like her. However, she is still single and doesn’t show any interest whatsoever in having a guy she can call her own. When it comes to love, she avoids the topic but peculiarly enough, she has brought it up “Falling in love is an illusion, a misconception that has been orchestrated for the faint-hearted. True love doesn’t exist. At least not for me,” she tells me. This takes me aback. My brothers would give anything to have her as their better half!

She is in her 4^th year of study but anyone claiming to love her is sent back with unfathomable insults. It all began when she was a 2^nd year and met Denver*. She played hard to get but later gave in. Everyone said they looked perfect together but Denver* never called her darling or any other romantic terms despite doing everything that couples do. What hurt her more was that he rarely told her that he loved her. She wanted to know who she was to him and about their future.

The words he spoke told her on that chilly morning echo in her mind and scar her heart whenever she remembers them: “We are just FRIENDS. So stop thinking about things that can never happen.” So it had all been a joke to him? He had been using her just like he did all other girls?!She had been in love alone all these months. She had fallen for a PLAYER!! Lisa* then tells me, “I gave him my heart but he gave me trash in return. If that’s what it means to be in love, then I’d rather remain single. I’d rather love myself.”

Stacy’s* case is a wee bit different from Lisa’s*. Frank* had always told her that he loved her, called her his one and only GIRLFRIEND, sweet-heart and all other sweet nothings. However, she had busted him countless times cheating on her but somehow (she wouldn’t understand how) she always took him back. She decided to call it quits when she busted him with her roommate/ best friend and they even had had the audacity to showcase their betrayal on her very own bed! For Stacy,* men are never to be trusted, especially campus dudes though she is currently dating one; a fact that I cannot comprehend. “It’s not for love but for survival; a way of revenge,” she retorts with a self-satisfied smirk.

Violet* is in her 3^rd year of study, very popular among the campus guys, sociable, outgoing, you name it. I wouldn’t call her a party pooper but rather a party queen. It would be a Herculean task to know her real boyfriend as she frequently changes them. Some would call her a PROSTITUTE but she sees nothing wrong with what she does. After all, Titus,* the boyfriend who once called her WIFE no longer considered her “wife material.” “What more is there to live for after you’ve given everything and even aborted for a sleaze ball who later disregards you in every way then immediately marries someone else? Tell me, what?” she asks me, tears trickling down her reddened cheeks.

I shudder for a while as I can see clearly in her eyes that she is still hurting from that heartbreak and the drinking is just a camouflage to hide this fact from herself and anyone else who would care to notice. She is wasting away and pretending not to give two hoots about it but deep down I know that she is yearning for help, yearning for love.

After 2weeks of busting a gut to get Rose* to have a conversation with me, I finally succeed. We meet at a prairie at the Falls, the only place where she feels safe although she keeps looking into the distance as though someone was watching us. She is adorned in smart, casual apparel but her face is not as rosy as you would expect. She has a bruise on the cheek and she blames it on banging her head on the door; the same thing she said last week concerning her bandaged arm.

She says that Brian* loves her and that he will change but that’s the same as wishing that horses had wings; I just don’t see it happening. Her life is in danger but she just won’t listen to me. She keeps growing thinner by the day and even the mere drop of a spoon scares her almost to death. Her phone rings and she shudders. It’s Brian* as I expected. Barely 5minutes into our conversation and she immediately has to leave. She is Brian’s* SLAVE; always there at his beck and call. How I wish I could get her out of that abusive relationship with that good for nothing Brian* who’s been cheating on her since God knows when. If only I knew how. . .

The names used in this article are not the real names of the said individuals. Asterix (*) sign has been used for anonymity purposes.

Watch out next week for the 4^th and final part in this 4part continuing series: The “NO STRINGS ATTACHED” Type of Guy.

THE MAN OF THE CHICKEN BLOOD

By mwitari David

The terrorism program which has been enjoying airplay here in paradiso of higher learning spearheaded by mashoka has aroused my cold blooded tubes under my skin as it happened when us in –kistan and -ganstan were attacked by Obama.This has forced me the son from the land where the horizon is the end of the earth think outside the box to try and avoid any cowardly attempt by mashoka to disrupt any snoopy businesses with my charming sweetheart who lives in a lodging around mabs.Hence,I have decided to award him the most honourable tittles of this paradise,that is chemical names from our land like al-mashoka,alias the great menace,alias the lion,alias octopus,alias Ocampo,alias serial killer and more to come.Moreover,I have formulae that led me to the blend of these names.

Firstly,he is al-mashoka alqshabab because he strikes in a terrific speed only comparerable to that of his cousins Alqaeda and Alshabab.I realized they should bear the same branding since the training is done in Mogadishu.What I am sure of is that al-mashoka has a chicken blood.I have not started being stubborn but I found out he smells the red substance in the tubes underneath our skin and gets its colourful aroma in the mituras at the mabs where the manufacture of the red papers is owesome.Is this not romantic?Remember the word alqshabab comes subsequently since he has been active during the late month of ramathan.I am sure he baptizes some of his worms in his tummy which I believe he has.For this damange I have made by upgrading his status i guess how explosive it is to introduce him to my brothers in diaspora especially in Mogadishu.

Secondly,I call him the great menace because he has scared away our tushungwas in D-hostels,C,and D-houses from doing the pumping.Imagine,although the ATMS are currently full I have not withdrawn from them lately this bully month of athman.Let the old folks get baptized in our wells all in the name of Al-mashoka alqshabab,alias the lion,alias aman with the chicken blood.I am sorry I don’t intend to book an appointment with him.Fellow primates, by saying that I am not a coward,as you know the Akuku Danger blood in me is capable of wrestling him,but what you did during the Kigeugeu phyobia day when I allowed my charming sweetheart to join you in my absence by sneezing all the perfume she had sprayed to attract me has made me shy away.You also taught her how to chant the Bed-over anthem which am trying to recite alongside my honourary degree.Hence I will not dare the lion.

Consequently,I call him the lion, alias the octopus, a cousin to Ocampo,alias the seriel killer because he walks into this cold war butchery when the sun goes for a sleep over on the other side of the ngeria forest.this means he fights only when other lions trek.He is octopus a cousin to ocampo because when he strikes he is unpredictable and also consults nobody especially here in the able paradise of higher learning.On the other side he performs his sacrifices in series thus the serial killer.He has exhibited more energy than his senior lecturer one and only Onyancha.Damn he!

Moreover,I have an antidote for this al-mashoka alqshabab,alias the lion,alias the serial killer one and only octopus a cousin to Ocampo.It is simple,get access to the software Onyancha his senior lecturer used in his calling.We will develop a virus which can work miracles similar to the ones “rat rat pesticide” performs to the generation of rats.I am sure it will confuse his battalion as it happened in –kistan.

LET US MAKE LUST

By K’amimo Emox

As much as I believe in human freedom and defend this basic right to the grave, Am also a staunch believer in the truth that the ultimate test of freedom is responsibility. The ultimate beauty of sex is commitment. The sweetness of this gift lies in responsibility; that is its compulsory accessory.”

It is spoken in low tones, for some it’s a taboo to speak about, yet they are its active practitioners. The question is whether it is making love, making lust or sex. Making love is more than just having sex. Many have however lustfully misused sex claiming they make love, while in essence, they are making lust. Sex without responsibility is a shame to human dignity. Disagree with me but even birds and animals have sex selectively. Some species even set conditions before they go bingo. Sex therefore raises a question of what morality is. Morality is simply what you feel good after, what is immoral is what you feel bad after.

It is a fact I must admit, a condom does prevent one from pregnancy and maybe from HIV. However, dose it protect you from emotional torture? Does it protect you from guilt and feelings of worthlessness? Most importantly, does it protect you from feeling cheap? The answer is big NO.

American poet, Ralph Waldo Emerson says it clearly that, “Nothing can bring you peace but yourself, nothing but the triumph of principles.” We have seen many who used themselves only to claim later that they were misused and dumped. Sex will never exist without strings attached, even twilight girls will tell you so. The emotional scars of the act are worse than any lethal disease. The worst part of the fiasco, however is that they never completely heal. They have the most delicate of triggers. Sleeping around therefore does not make you a hero or a heroine. As much as I believe in human freedom and defend this basic right to the grave, Am also a staunch believer in the truth that the ultimate test of freedom is responsibility. The ultimate beauty of sex is commitment. The sweetness of this gift lies in responsibility; that is its compulsory accessory.

Sex has for long been lauded as one of the best way to exercise. In fact some peers in our circles term it ‘sexercise.’ What they never tell you is that it is also the shortest cut to unhappiness and sadly also the fastest route to a quick demise.

People engage in sex for very flimsy of reasons. Some do it to prove a point. They try to prove either their manhood or womanhood. I would call this dumb and silly. I mean you only need to stand before a mirror in your nature suit or take a good look at yourself in the bathroom. Others claim to use sex to prove that they love one another only to become bitter enemies. In the bible Amon hated her sister, Tamar more than he had ever loved her immediately he slept with her.

The most stupid of all reasons for playing sex is to gain experience. I spent most of my childhood in our farms. While there I had a chance to see animals give birth, after a few days, the young animals would, mount one another, and no one taught them. This therefore shows that the act is so natural that you need no school to teach you. Provided emotion and passion reigns supreme, it’s an inborn basic animal instinct.

To sum this, just remember that you may become a false hero through your sex escapades but that is just a fallacy. A time comes when the sins of the past come knocking at your present. They knock loud at your door and refuse to go. This is the time you’ll remember that you perfectly made lust

MAVAZI GANI HAYA

By Ali Mwero

“Waenda chuo kikuu, maisha huko ni ya kufurahisha sana lakini wakati mwingine huwa shubiri, kwa hivyo hadhari”, hivyo ndivyo mulamu alinitahadharisha na kunishauri. Mnamo tarehe kumi mwezi wa saba nilifika mji wa Eldoret. Baridi kali ilinifanya ni tetemeke ja kifaranga. Wakati huo huo mtima wangu ulikuwa wenye bashasha belele kwani nilitamani kuyaona na kuyashuhudia mazingira ya chuo kikuu cha Moi

Baada ya kusajiliwa, nilijipa moyo wa kufanya matembezi ya hapa na pale ili kujifahamisha na mazingira ya chuo hiki kikuu.Ama kwa kweli ninavumilia na kuyameza mate machungu kwa mavazi niyashuhudiayo. Wengi watasema mimi ni limbukeni lakini katika hali halisi wenye mavazi hayo ndio waliobobea katika ulimbukeni na kujishusha hadhi.

Siku ya kwanza nilipokutana na ‘Getrude’ alikuwa amevalia mavazi nadhifu na yakupendeza si haba. Heshima na kongole nilimpa, nilitamani kumuongelesha lakini niliogopa kuaibika hadharani. Cha kushangaza, baada ya majuma mawili kutoka siku tuliyosajiliwa ‘Getrude’ nilimuona amevalia suruali ndefu iliyombana mapajani na juu alikuwa na bilauzi ambayo haikumsetiri tumbo lake. Aliponisongelea kunisalimu, alijaribu kujinyoosha mwiliwe, salale! Niliduwaa huku mtima ukinienda mbio . Niliyoyaona si ya kuhadithiwa bali kila insi anaelewa bayana.

Si hayo tu, siku nyingine nilipomuona alikuwa amevalia kaptula ambayo iliacha nyonga zote peupe. Bilauzi aliyovalia ilifanya maziwa yake kuonekana. Nilishangaa ghaya na tangu siku hiyo sikuwa na hamu hata ya kumuangalia binti huyo. Chuki dhidi yake ilinijaa na kunifanya kumtema ‘Getrude’ kwenye moyo wangu. Iwapi tofauti kati yetu na wanyama????

Huu ni mfano tu, lakini kunayo mengi ambayo yanitia kiwewe ndiposa uozo katika jamii hautokoma abadan katan.Ningewasihi dada zetu wajipe hadhi kwa kuvaa mavazi mwafaka na ya heshima. Mungu si Athmani! Siku utakayokutana na Israeli ndiyo siku utakayokumbuka maisha yako na haswa mavazi yako.

Najua inawachoma sana, lakini sina budi kuufungua ukurasa mpya wa hisia zangu. Japo ni chuo chenye tofauti lakini tofauti yenu ya mavazi inatia wahaka nyoyoni mwa wengi. Kwa wale wanaokereka mtaniwia radhi kwa sababu huu ni mwanzo na mwanzo wa ngoma ni lele

Comrade laid to rest

By Victor moguche

The late dominic mwenda kinoti was laid to rest on Tuesday afternoon.Student leaders and comrades attended the burial ceremony in the company of the Asst. Dean of students,Rev John Ayieko.Moi University chaplain Rev Tanui also attended the farewell ceremony.Comrades who travelled for the final farewell were overwhelmed in grief as they bid goodbye to a loved one ,friend and entertainer.

Dominic who was famously known as dj Dommie to comrades was laid to rest around 4.30 pm on Tuesday at his home village of Muuti-o-nthunguri.He was the first born in a family of three siblings.

He was admitted to Moi university in 2009 to pursue a degree course in aviation but later changed to pursue a BBM degree course.He was a third year student at the time of his untimely passing on.The death happened at Moi Teaching and Refferal hospital,Eldoret after being rushed there from the dispensary.

The late was a passionate disk jockey mostly plying his trade at the club Chambers.He was a sworn hustler who believed on honest living.

May God rest his soul in eternal peace