CAMPUS DATING GAME

By Purity Museo

Unknown to many, the average university girl no longer has time to date the young guy in her IRD class. Many wish to hook up with top CEOs, politicians, business men and anyone else in the public eye willing to bankroll their lives and make their lofty dreams cross from fantasy into reality. Men on the other hand have their fat wallets out for a little passionate presence. Campus guys on the other hand prefer sugar mummies.

The major reason behind all this is the dating games in campus. Most students are usually advised by their parents and friends not to associate with campus men and women because they are heart-breakers. This advice is normally broken the first two weeks of stay in campus.

The campus experience is just as much about experiences outside of the classroom as it is inside. The innocent age is mostly in the first year of campus. The girls are at their most naïve stage, of course, in spite of themselves thinking otherwise. They have all kinds of set values and high standards. He must be smart, well dressed, kind, polite, a Muslim or Christian preferably of the same denomination. Guys in campus understand this well so they act as expected.

The first day she meets ‘Mr. Right’, she is invited for coffee. The girl gets excited after seeing a carpeted room with a music system and TV, which she does not have. She becomes a frequent visitor and slowly but sure, she is entrapped. She gets used to being taken out for supper and dinner and so she cannot cook any more. She is introduced to drinking and sex (the man assuming that the pot-belly doesn’t get in the way). When she is in her second year, all she thinks about is going out to have fun. 

The guy plans to dump her because of her behaviour. She is now described as a drunkard who does not know how to cook, unworthy to be introduced to ones’ parents because of her indecency and now a gold digger who is after men’s money. The spare key to the guy’s room is taken back and the guy becomes busy with assignments which never existed when they met.

The cycle repeats as he waits for the next group of freshers with his headphones stuck in place as head bops to the music. Since she’s used to the life of plenty, when the guy’s pockets ‘narrow’, she clings to an old man without giving a hoot that the man is married, and has no remorse for the poor woman who’s old enough to be her mother with whom she is brazenly competing for ‘love’.

In his fourth year, the guy realizes that he is late and desperately starts chasing after older ladies.
At your tender age, you end up contracting AIDS and other STDs. Remember that being single is not a death sentence hence it is important to be patient and wait for the right person. You might destroy your body when you think you are satisfying it.

WILL THEY CONSIDER THEIR FAULT?

By Kinyua Njeri

As we approach the long awaited exams,
Exam the nightmare,
Is here with us to dare,
I wonder whether we will fare,
With moods in the air’
But will they consider their fault?

April we came,
Luggage made us claim,
And wish our campus was like them,
Who defend health, life and justice when trained,
But will they consider their fault?

Nights pirated for accommodation,
Therefore creating havoc, stress and commotion
Rooms that we in vain sought sanitation,
And never found it even after negotiation,
But will they consider their fault?

Blackouts that never paved us to read,
Or even cook our hunger and stress to get rid,
Lectures that constantly bounced,
And inaudibility that was pronounced,
But will they consider their fault?

And now that the exam is here,
I wish they admit their fault and hear,
What we have to make clear,
They ought to think of us as we fear,
But will they consider their fault?

EXAM PREPARATIONS AMIDST CONFUSION

Over 500 students are at a risk of missing this semester's examinations which begin on Monday next week. This follows the delay in the disbursement of HELB funds. 

The University's stand that students ought to have cleared fees before issuance of exams cards has left needy students in a precarious position. Already, some students are mauling over deferring the examinations.

However, we have established that a group of students will today hold a discussion with the DVC in charge of student affairs, Prof. Nathan Ogechi, over the matter. Sources intimate that the group will petition the administration to allow those with outstanding balances to sit for the examinations. 

Changes in the calendar seem to have caught the lending body, HELB, off guard. The most affected group is the current third years, who reported in April after the long holiday. Normally, students receive the funds from August.

An official communication regarding the matter will be released at 3 pm.

THE AVERAGE FOURTH-YEAR...

By Shiku Ngigi

- Is on his last semester of his 8-4-4 and age is catching up. Either that or he has thrown caution to the wind. He has no idea what courses he’s taking. If he has, he has no knowledge of their titles, leave alone their codes. He never missed classes in earlier years but today, attending lectures is the exception, not the rule.
-Will remember that registration forms are filled on the day before exams, she will then scribble on some course registration form very fast, forge the signatures then fill in an examination course form. It will then hit her that she has not paid her fee yet. She’ll rush to that tiny National Bank and stand in an endless line. Back in the day, she paid her fee a month before the opening date, a good faithful freshman.
-Does not study for CATs. There is a reason they are Continuous Assessment Tests, right? You walk in there like a man (woman) and fill the paper with that massive knowledge that cannot be attained from books. With age comes great confidence and a full disk space up in your head. Also, the rumour that lecturers don’t mark papers but play the ‘picky picky ponky’ game to grade papers has got to his head. Therefore, whether he reads or not, he’ll likely get the same marks (bad move).
-Is a wealth of knowledge stored in cartons of hand-outs and disks of soft copies; a walking repository. If I were you, I’d grab the nearest senior’s hand and request her to unload all these printouts and files into your flash disks and files.
-Will have spent an average of 6000/- on the electric contraptions commonly known as coils in campus. She has also acquired the skills to tap electricity from naked wires and steal fluorescent tubes from the kitchens and washrooms when the one in her room is burnt out.
-Was here during the infamous 2009 strike, the Mashoka era and the invention of long holidays which redefined the very age-old meaning of long. The pseudo-fourth years out there have gone on a longer one. Let’s just say their successors may go on one that will clock 12 months. And Moi University will once again break its own record!
-Remembers with nostalgia the days she could walk into the library with her laptop bag so that it would not get stolen by some nitwit at the entrance. Better still, her laptop would not find its way to the hard floor after dropping from her hands while she walked up those flights of stairs.
-Has a whole new wardrobe. Her skirts are shorter, her pants tighter and her shoes higher. Show her a picture of herself back in 2009, she will laugh and say that she was “innocent” and “naïve”. Ask me what she was, I will tell you. She was herself.
-Has been rejected by enough ladies, he is now immune. In fact, he just chats them up for fun nowadays. If she says yes, he might just be shocked into a cardiac arrest!
-Just recently learnt how it feels to be inside a Moi University bus. Destination, Mombasa (I wonder how no other destination tickles students’ fancy as much as this place). He came back darker and relaxed only to scowl at the ‘Karibu Umefika’ signpost. Life has to go on.
-Is staring at his research project wondering how time flew so fast. Part of him wants to be out of here, the other wants to hang around a bit. He needs to have a bit more fun before he gets out there to give the world what he’s got. All the same, he’s already got his clearance form and gathered half the signatures required. And no, he will not tarmac. Opportunities galore out there, he has it all figured out. Wait and see.

FROM FISHERS OF MEN TO FISHERS OF WOMEN

By Verah Chepkorir

It is now six months (if I am not wrong) since this fresha met a 5th year guy. She was just introduced to him by a 3rd year ally who also had a new catch in the precious School of Technology. The mechanical engineering student, (let’s call him Gideon) was impressed by this young, pretty and stunning first year (call her Jude). 

She had all the body assets a man could dream about; let me say many were left smacking their lips in total admiration. Her voice and face had caused a throb in him. But for a gentleman, spilling the oil at first sight will sound a little peculiar. He would rather preserve it for the next meet, if by any chance they would.


The introduction part was over, but the third year noticed something fishy in Gideon`s eyes. All the same, she never bothered. An eye that doesn’t rest on you has got nothing to do with you. They parted, having clearly noted the girls’ face, anticipating for the next meeting.
 
After a couple of days, they happened to bump into each other at the New Valley Hotel, fortuitous indeed for the guy. How could she have forgotten him? She had just ordered a glass of mango juice, but alas! In feverish excitement he had converted it to a dinner! This was a good surprise. Don’t let me tell you what the menu entailed. I am made to believe that is how men fish ladies here in campus, especially first years that never turn down offers. She really got impressed. Never in her life had a man been that benevolent to her.

That is how Jude, a virgin from an anonymous home, found herself in an affair with Gideon. He could buy her anything she wanted and take her out in all possible restaurants at stage. She just felt like a queen crowned in her own world. First, dating an engineer in his 5th year of study was the greatest triumph. Secondly, she was able to catch his eye, out of all the other chiqs in campus. She kept patting her breast with a streak of pride. Little did she know…
 
She could not utter any word to her friends without mentioning her boyfriend. “Gideon took me to HIJAZ… He bought me a Valentines present, He said he will go to town for an outing… my Gideon is awesome…” and the other entire indolent girl talk. She spent almost all her weekends in Ngeria Hall 1, cleaning his clothes and utensils, just to show loyalty to her king. At times she would miss her classes especially on Monday morning due to the sleep over. The distance from Ngeria to the School of Human Resource was long for her.
 
Not until exam time did communication start to diminish. Previously, he would call her at least twice a day. She would not take a day without hearing from him. She was vaguely thwarted, consoling herself that all this was brought about by the very challenging exams in the school of technology. But could assumptions really work? No. Maybe he was sick or something… She decided to call him, but to no avail. She was left exasperated. What might have happened?
 
Finally, he was done with exams, but still didn’t communicate. This prompted her into making an impromptu visit to his room. Poor Jude! Opening the door unveiled another lady on his bed, half naked. By now you should have known what was happening. Jude was kicked out of the room, with a heavy blow on her cheek. “You useless, good for nothing…what has brought you here? 

Or you lost your senses? Who am I to you? Get out! Am having a sweet time with my sweetheart and you have the guts of befuddling us?” is what came from his mouth. She felt that the whole earth could burst open and crush her into pieces. She was in total turmoil and could not help sobbing. She just carried her now pregnant body back to hostel K. She later got an SMS from Gideon, informing her not to bother-their affair was just a contract.

The writer is a 1st year journalism student.

AN OPEN LETTER TO CHARLES RINGERA – HELB CEO

By Eric Kinaga

I am aware that in the recent days, Kenyans have adopted the habit of writing 'OPEN LETTERS TO' so and so. Some of these are purely publicity stunts. Yet there are others coming from deep within ours hearts. Mine lies here.

I am not sure you know this, but Moi University (Main Campus) has its third years in session; class of 2011-2015. Their recalling was actually by accident. While they expected to be recalled back to school somewhere in July or August, they were recalled on April 15th. That is over two months ago. 

While I appreciate that yours isn’t a gutter organization, driven to serve a few hundreds, I must bring to your attention the plight of these men and women; those waiting to take up your position when that time comes. 

We have tried to seek communication with your office, Mr CEO. We have tried. We have approached administrators, accountants, Deans and DVCs here at main campus, seeking to know why we haven't received any financial boosting from your side. Some of them claimed that HELB was a separate entity and, as such, any complaints should be addressed directly to it. And yet these were the same people that recalled us back with no financial grounding. 

A few days ago, we came across an announcement. Your team would be coming over to deal with this issue. This was after a list was pinned on the notice board, revealing hundreds of names of those that had qualified for disbursements. Yet three weeks later, our accounts remain thirsty.

We start our exams in four days. And the university has a policy of not letting anyone sit examinations without first clearing their fees. We have tried to negotiate, only to reach a dead end. Until now, no one has spoken to you about this, or even written. If they had, I would not have to do this. (I hate writing long letters by the way.)

I have not met you before, and I am hoping one day I will. But I am sure that in your capacity, you can do something to help, if you so wish. This hope is what drives me, and many others, to ensure that none of us misses their exams, simply because they can't afford to clear their fee balance. Or have to go for days without meals, with no surety that all shall be well. 

We hear there was a message relayed to us; that we would receive the money in a fortnight. That's the same time our exams end. We ask, how shall we start?

I don't need to conclude this, but ask that you take appropriate measures to deal with this issue. And if possible, do so in haste. In the meantime, I shall prepare for my exams, knowing that our prayers will be answered. And funds disbursed. Kind regards.

SPLENDID START FOR AFRICA, WORLD CHAMPIONS AND THE HOSTS

By James Kombe

Nigeria, representing Africa in the 2013 FIFA Confederation Cup, produced a commendable start in the competition after claiming an easy 6-1 victory over Tahiti on the night of Monday 17th June, 2013. The tournament, being hosted in South America’s Brazil, commenced on Saturday 15th and will have its final played on 30th this month.

Nnamadi Oduamadi completed a hat-trick while Uwa Echiejile scored a brace for the Super Eagles as they subjected the Pacific Islanders to humiliation in their first match at a senior FIFA world tournament. The only Tahiti consolation goal came from Jonathan Tehau, who converted Marama Vahirua’s corner with a wonderful header past Nigerian goalkeeper, Vincent Enyeama on the 54th minute. Tehau however erroneously scored a 68th minute own goal to add to the African champions’ tally on their 19th match without defeat, their longest ever unbeaten run.

The Super Eagles defeated Burkina Faso 1-0 in the February 2013 Africa Cup of Nations final in South Africa to earn the right to represent Africa at the FIFA Confederations Cup. They currently sit on 31st world position and 4th in Africa according to the latest FIFA rankings and top of group F in Africa’s 2014 World Cup Qualifiers.

Tahiti, the Oceania champion’s next match will be against the World and European champions, Spain on Thursday 20th in a match which weighs the world’s 1st position against 138th in the FIFA Ranking. On the other hand, the Super Eagles will battle against South American champions, Uruguay, on Friday 21st.
In the previous matches, Brazil (who qualified automatically as the host country) started with a 3-0 clean sheet against Asian champions, Japan in the competition’s opening match on Saturday. Neymar da Silva, FC Barcelona’s new signing, opened up the goal-scoring campaign with a 3rd minute long range strike, followed by José Paulinho and João Alves’ goals on the 48th and 93rd minutes respectively. Brazil is the defending champion of the Confederation Cup, having won it in both 2005 and 2009.

Later on the same day, Spain who qualified for the Confederations Cup as the reigning FIFA World Cup champions also started with a 2-1 victory over Uruguay. They took an early 2-0 lead, courtesy of Pedro Rodriguez and Roberto Soldado’s 20th and 32nd minute goals. With just two minutes to the end of the match, Liverpool forward, Luis Suarez’s 88th minute brilliant free kick outdid Iker Casillas to give the South American side their lone goal.

MAJOR CATEGORIES OF CAMPUS STUDENTS

By Elizabeth Asasha

The analogue

Those who never yield to pressure and live up to the vow they made to their parents and villagers. The digitals call them sisters or brethren. If you cannot trace such a person in his room on a weekend night, find out where a fellowship, Bible study or other church activity is taking place. They will do the group assignments with or without the other members. They are too innocent to snitch.

The genuinely undecided batch

The second bracket is genuinely undecided; they are never sure what to believe and what to discard, what to do or what to let go. They are eternally vague and more often than not could easily be swayed by any type of wind. Literally, they are the following suit, dubious sort, ready to jump on the bandwagon. All that brews in their mind is what is Nelly up to?

The digital bracket

I had always misconceived the contextual meaning of this word whenever comrades used it in their vocabulary until the other day that I realized the word exuded a new meaning in town, call it a connotative signification. These are the people whose constitution boldly stipulates that ‘traversing a weekend in your hostel is a taboo’ and you would only be allowed to infringe the rule on condition that you host a ‘friend with benefits’. You would leave lips asunder in dismay simply because you slip between the sheets every night of the calendar.

For them, the value attached to Friday is just palpable if not conspicuous. Messages like ‘form ni gani?’ ‘mpango ni upi?’ and ‘is how?’ on Friday evening are a trademark and they are pros at deciphering the meaning. They tend to have a ‘nose for funkies’, kadunda, Mr. and Miss Campus and the rest. They are the kind of guys who will come with their weekend hangovers and bellow at the analogues, “I’ve got a lot of stuff in my head and assignment is not part of them!” before throwing a 20bob or 10bob coin to cater for printing cost.

I never comprehended the difference in the three assortments of students in Campus until I landed in the University with a difference; the only place where you can crack your puzzles irrespective of their magnitude.

LECTURER DIES IN ROAD ACCIDENT

A senior lecturer passed on in a road accident this morning at around 9 am on his way to Kisumu. Eng. Isaiah K. Chebii died on the spot when his car collided with an oncoming truck close to Sondu-Miriu. He was overtaking the vehicle ahead. 

The deceased was travelling with his daughter. She is recuperating in hospital. The late Eng. Chebii was also the Head of Department – Mechanical and Production Engineering. 

He will be remembered for commitment to his work and his jovial nature. May his soul rest in peace.

AN OPEN LETTER TO THE ADMINISTRATION

By Jeff Kenyatta

She’s not alone, that orphan; that comrade. For along the highway, I’ve met many, parched with thirst, dying of hunger over a ‘helbless’ semester; the voiceless unknowns.

I heard her cryptic call of help by the knock at my door. She’s got no parents, they both died. She’s left alone, soliciting funds from well-wishers to pay for her college fee and upkeep. Her last hope to clear fee – HELB, still remains a nightmare. A victim of circumstance, she’s bound to miss her exams.

It’s a cold world, an insensitive system. It turns a blind eye to the poor child seeking an education. It left her with no shelter – told her to clear fee and rent before she secures a room. Where should she turn to for help? MUSO bursary kitty is bankrupt. The work-study programs have turned into charity programs, operating under a “No Pay, No Say” philosophy. A system that’s told her she’s on her own.

She’s not alone, that orphan; that comrade.

I’ve heard the surging pain in the words of a fellow classmate: We wanted the HELB money to be reflected, not on BOARD WALLS but in our BANK ACCOUNTS. The applicant lists pinned at the Students’ Centre was bogus; its intention was to silence the noise.
I’ve felt the rush during the HELB protest. In the shouts and clamour, in the presence of comrades who’d rather be there than attend classes. In the eyes of young ladies; worn out, but still up in arms, tired with sour feet but who still had the audacity to march with us to the administration to agitate for our cause.

I’ve seen the agony in rooms with empty shelves and dry tins; the despair and anguish of going to class with a grumbling stomach. I’ve seen the shame in soliciting, merely begging, hand-outs from classmates because your pockets do not have even a single silver coin.

Hungry and tired, we’ve strolled in offices, big offices. From the Dean’s corridors, we’ve gone to the senate chambers. From Room 134 to the DVC’s office, we’ve met virtually anyone and everyone. In a promissory note, we were assured that in case HELB funds wouldn’t have been disbursed by now, exams scheduled from 24th would ultimately be postponed or successful loan applicants who’ve not cleared fee, would be an exempted case in the issuance of exam cards.

Today, friends think of deferring studies. Today, classmates cannot find the ease of revising with the dilemma on whether they’ll seat for their exams. Today, the destitute and poor continue to wallow in the miasma of hopelessness. The orphans wish their parents would be alive to solve their education nightmare.

Outright desperation has led children of men to sleep with dogs. No one asks why. Here, not so long ago, a student stole his friend’s laptop to sell it to settle his fee balance – a sum of Sh. 9000. No one asks why.

Today, let us search our hearts. Do unto other men’s children as you would want them to do unto yours. Underneath the clamour of buildings and our day’s pursuits, let us join reason to faith and experience to action to transform our unity of interest into unity of purpose.

WILL MAIN CAMPUS RISE ABOVE BOARD?

By Timothy Simwa

It is normal within the context of Kenyan politics for election campaigns to resume barely few days after the inauguration of a new president. You wake up to projections and queer speculation of who might succeed an incumbent president who is barely a week old in office. We are a country where politics precedes economy whereas issues of national concern are treated with relative ease and leisure. 

As we take a break from the aftermath of the general elections, thank the Almighty that sanity prevailed over intolerance, hate and hooliganism, even though contentment and dissatisfaction were expressed in equal measures about its outcome. This depended on your coalition of inclination. Accept and move on was the new slogan that only the Hassan-Oswago-led team can explain. Our lives remained the same anyway. 

But of great concern is a precedent that the last election seemed to have set. It is a general consistent trend that has culminated and, by extension, defined our belly-crawling university politics. Having been witnessed at the University of Nairobi student elections, and then replicated at the Town Campus, the arithmetic of tyranny might finally find its way to main campus.

Despite the fiasco surrounding the MUSO elections, it will be held someday. It is evident that Jubilee/CORD orientation might shape the next MUSO elections. Even though this might not augur well with aspirants from the minority, it is this plain truth you have to grapple with and a characteristic of fledgling democracy. As a matter of fact the next MUSO chairman and his team (the university has never had a chairlady last time I checked) will be a product of tribal groupings. It will be a slugfest devoid of real issues that are fueling discontent among comrades. 

Aspirants will have to assess their ethnicity count. It is the only apparent strategy for you to flex your way through and procure MUSO shops ownership. (Of course that is what motivates aspirants around here). If by any chance you hail from the Kenyan big five (refer to census 2009 if you have no idea who they are), you stand a favourable chance. I take no delight in writing this article knowing it won’t be a walk in the park for people I share pedigree with: the minority. 

I think the elites are the leading masters of hate speech and propaganda. They have been at their beat at Balkanizing the country into tribal fiefdoms. Kenyans have perfected the of art reducing and manipulating anything bizarre that finds its way into mainstream media to reflect the even distribution of CORD and Jubilee, or even worse skew it towards a particular ethnicity.

The Mombasa dog saga that portends a grave threat to our tender fabric of morality was trivialized by worrying CORD and Jubilee die-hards to achieve a balance in ethnic representation. In such instances the minority will find a reason to contend with our awkward position in this country. MUSO elections will obviously be another platform for tyrannical manifestations. But being a university with a difference, anything is possible. May the strong tyranny wins.

BECAUSE YOU LOVE

By Irene Murithi

Is it bad to fall in love? I always thought it a very good feeling; that your friends should always be happy when you succeed to find a heart that cares for you. Friends beware of the “friends” you call your friends. Love is a sickness that one can never control when it befalls them. It is not a directive from one’s mind yet it takes full control of one.

Being in love, you learn to respect yourself and the one you love. You always feel satisfied and secure knowing that there is a heart somewhere that cares for and loves you. A heart that loves you would genuinely do anything to get a stay in your heart without paying any rent. It will make someone do the craziest of things to make you happy. When you find a person who strives to ensure there is always a smile on your face, be glad; you have found a lifetime friend and love.

Ever thought of the very many things you do in the name of love? Of course some are genuine and others are not. When it’s genuine, there will be no mandatory cases between two souls which are in love. On the other hand, there are others who will do things in the name of love yet deep inside them it is phony and they know it. If you ever sat down to write the things you do for a person you say you love, the list would be endless if you really are real about it.
You will always find yourself thinking about somebody. 

You’ll fantasize till you smile unknowingly, all in the name of love. You sleep, dream and possibly speak out your secrets deep in the night because you love. You feel attached and do not want them to leave because you love. You find yourself caught in a fix with friends possibly because they saw you and they really want to know when you fell in love. They say you discovered something that made you ignore them. You try getting out of the fix and your friends harass you, all in the name of your love. 

When you fall in love, I would advise you not to share it because those you share with could probably like it or not. Fellow Christians will either say he/she is not a believer so it is not good for you. Others in the same line will say he/she belongs to a different religion or even tribe. Do not run away! They are still your friends and you still need them, you only need to be distinctive. Probably there are some who are saying it out of a good heart while others are just saying it because they do not want to see you happy. You need to know who your true friends are. 

There are moments when you feel happy and need to talk to someone. Be sure you are ready to let the whole world know you are in love. As you get yourself a friend you ‘think’ you can trust, be cautious. I do not mean to say that the world should not know that you are in love. It does not also mean that you cannot trust your friends. No. The world, as a matter of fact, has a right to know you are in love and you are loved and you too have a right to trust your friends. 

Keep yourselves safe, friends. Stay far away from them who keep on questioning and following up on everything you do yet they have their own and will not talk about them. They want to keep themselves safe from the hands of the world but they want you there. Stay safe, play a game of love and one that is worth because you love.

HELB PROBLEM NOT SOLVED

By Boaz Onyango 

The much awaited HELB delegation has finally arrived. It turns out to comprise of only one individual who is expected to sort out the problems of more than 200 comrades!

I talked to the official just a few minutes ago before the room got crowded. Her response to comrades’ questions is rather flattering. I asked her a very simple question “Can you check, confirm and tell me if you received my form?” She looked at me and politely answered that she did not know whether my form had been received or not.

Not the type to give up easily, I asked her another question “Do you have any idea when HELB will disburse funds to the students who have not received their loan yet? Her answer did not surprise me. She again looked at me and politely told me that she had absolutely no idea.

Having answered all my questions to the best of her ability, it was time to give other comrades an opportunity for their questions to be answered. I stood up and looked at her, then wondered to myself, is this a mockery or what? How can a person who is supposed to assist you solve your problems be more blank than yourself?

Tomorrow we will seek an audience with the DVC over this issue and also to request him to allow students with a fee balance of 4000 to sit for exams because it’s not their fault that money has not been disbursed.

EXILES IN CAMPUS

By Stanley Kimuge

Some weeks ago, I stumbled upon one of those Facebook pages meant to bolster insanity. “Kama haujawahi chapana exile ukiwa campo wewe uko down” (If you have never chased out your roommate you are dumb). In campus exile means being chased away from your room. And the person will be left to square out their business in bed without fear of interference. I did some research and found out that there are six types of exiles that can befall anybody.

NORMAL EXILES
In this category are guys with partners who live miles away. They slap you with a prior notice, say, two weeks to D-day or even a month. Victims will attest to this fact. They are given ample time to sort themselves out. The host will make sure that they have pestered your ears with a "hope umewahi place ya kudoze" chorus every now and then as a reminder. When the visitor arrives, the room remains out of bounds. The exile will be left to their own devices!

IMPROMPTU EXILES
I have noted that these are so common. A lady walks into your room. Maybe she came to catch up on a popular soap opera or the latest happenings; or possibly to hand in an assignment to you as the group leader. Fortunately, you own a TV, or if your pocket is fat enough, you have installed that which uses a white basin on the roof. You just hope that you are not interrupted for the better part of the session. You will cross your fingers that your nagging roommate will extend his time in the library.

BUSINESS EXILES
They are an innovative lot who exploit anything on this planet. Naturally, these are the guys who are lucky to find themselves. That’s how exiles have gone a notch higher, money talks. A roommate will stubbornly allow you to enjoy the space after parting with some token. You may think it is a lodge. But this too exists. After all scratch my back and you definitely smile all the way to bed for as long as you may want!

BUSH EXILES
Nowadays you wouldn't be surprised to catch a glimpse of a used gadget staring at you on your way to lecture. But just walk at night you will hear hushed voices from the bush. Either the roommates are stubborn or you're a victim of circumstances.
I am talking about those guys who reside in common rooms or hapless enough to live with 8 roommates. No wonder those guys from C Houses cunningly invite their girlfriends for discussion in the library then ask them to accompany them to the room, only to strip off the girl's pants inside the bush.

HARD-CORE EXILES
This is involves a roommate, usually a senior with two roommates, his campus "wife" and a junior guy. The cohabiting lady rarely sleeps in the room she hustled for at the beginning of semester. The junior to the real roommate will normally be forced to take piritons to ward off regular interruptions to his dreams! Each day, he smirks at the oppressive roommate.

CONTRACTUAL EXILES
I must admit this is a new trend in campus. It is a well-tailored deal. Probably, you had persuaded the roommate to allow you to accomplish your business. He bluntly scoffed your request. You leave your roommate hoping that when he harvests one, you will pay back. That’s the consolation you have. A quick idea comes to your sight. You remember your neighbour. His roommate went home. He too has taken a short holiday from the bed-dancing competition. He reluctantly allows you to sweat on his bed for one or two nights. But you have to place in your diary that he will terminate the contract any time.

Disclaimer: The writer of this article is not in any way advocating for exiles in campus.

Difference between Dual-Core, Core i3, Core i5 and Core i7

By Isaac Meso

The other day I was chatting with a friend of mine and he was really excited about how his new toy that had been shipped from U.K was all powerful. One thing that caught my attention during our chat was when he said that his laptop had a core i7 processor. So I played dumb and asked him what that meant and to my dismay he went completely blank.

My friend is just one of the many people who have little or no idea what these features that are inscribed on our laptops really mean. To shade more light on this topic I would start first by briefly explaining what a core is.

All computers come with processors. The core is that part of the processor that actually performs the reading and executing of instructions. This means that a multi core processor would execute more than one instruction at a time on the same piece of silicon. In addition your computer will read each core as a separate CPU. For instance if your PC is dual-core it means that your machine has two cores in a single processor. The computer reads this as two separate CPUs meaning you can handle multiple tasks at a time.

Now that we have a rough idea what a core is, what is the difference between Core i3, Core i5 and Core i7 and what do they really mean? First of all let us erase this fallacy that is common with most computer users; that the numbers beside the Cores reflect the number of processors in your PC. Core i7 does not have seven processors nor does Core i3 have three processors. On the contrary the number is usually indicative of their processing powers.

The relative processing powers of these cores is usually based on a collection of criteria including, number of cores, clock speed (in GHz), size of the cache, Turbo Boost and Hyper-Threading.
The main difference however between these processor technologies can be pegged on three major factors:

Number of cores

The more cores there are in a processor the more tasks (known as threads) served at the same. For instance Core i3 CPU has the lowest number of cores. It comes with only two cores thus the name dual-core processors. On the other hand Core i5 processors come with 4 cores meaning it comes with 4 processors.

Turbo Boost

The Turbo Boost technology common with Intel products allows a processor to dynamically increase its clock speed whenever need arises. However the maximum amount that a Turbo Boost can raise clock speed at any given time is dependent on the number of active cores, among other factors such as the estimated power consumption.

For instance none of the Core i3 CPUs have Turbo Boost. Core i5 processors on the other hand are equipped with Turbo Boost 2.0 technology. This means that core i5 processors can outrun any Core i3 while Core i7 can outrun any core i5 processors.

Cache size

Last but not leas, cache is that memory inside the CPU that stores data that the processor keeps using over and over again. Cache function like RAM, only that it is faster since it’s located within the processor itself.

With a larger cache more data can be accessed quickly. Core i3 processors have 3MB cache. Core i5s come with 6MB of cache while Core i7s come with 8MB of cache. This is clearly one reason why an i7 will outperform an i5 and an i5 outperform an i3.

SUICIDE, NOT ME!

By Boaz Onyango

‘A third year electrical engineering student at Moi University commits suicide’ reports the 3rd Eye. The reader reads and then sighs absent-mindedly and then flips to other stories. The news spreads quickly, everybody talks about the sad incident and marvels but two days down the line the story is soon forgotten and fades into oblivion like the Nyayo milk. Nobody takes a second to remember or try to find out who the unfortunate student was! Moi University will, as a routine, send a eulogy to the family and then proceed to say that until his death he was a third year.

‘Suicide, not me!’ We often say this, thinking that we are immune to this menace; that it can only happen to others but not to us. It’s like road accident death tolls that remain statistical figures to us until we lose a limb and escape death by a whisker. Then we became part of that statistic and know that accidents are real and claim lives! 

The truth of the matter is that even those who end up killing themselves never contemplated that they would, one day, cut their lives short by hanging their necks on a rope. This evil act respects no boundary and we cannot afford to be indifferent because it claims lives of both the young and the old daily around the world. The educated and illiterate, the poor and not even the rich are spared! It’s like cancer.

Well we might be lucky to escape but our beloved brothers and sisters, friends, cousins and parents can all fall victim. Wouldn't it affect us? I don’t know the answer to that question but what I know is that funeral services are enjoyable if attended only in the neighbours’ homestead!

I knew the late Chester Katuva and I am sad to write this article in honour of his memory. He was my neighbour in C Houses before he went home. We would exchange greetings whenever we met in the corridor of the house. I didn't get to know him on a personal level but his quietness and humility could not be lost on any person who happened to meet him. Like most, he didn't look like the suicidal type. My heart bleeds for his family. We lost a potential engineer who could have helped to construct Konza or Tatu City in pursuance of vision 2030!

How many more lives shall we continue to lose? All of us are at a risk and we cannot afford to turn a blind eye and play ostrich politics of burying our heads in the sand while this monster continues to claim innocent lives every day. Like a small spark of fire normally causes a big inferno, and small things generate into big things, suicide starts like a joke, triggered by small things like a nasty comment from a close person like sweethearts or parents. This nasty comment then finds a place and settles in your mind! It then begins to prick your conscious and nag your thoughts, and then the devil comes uninvited and takes it from there. The incident hits headlines in media stations. It gets to be reported as breaking news!

Factors that trigger suicidal thoughts include, but not limited to, bad relationships or breakups. My advice to you is; go slow when it comes to love because there is danger in loving someone too much! Don’t neglect your brain. Let it also love because unlike the fragile heart it can’t be broken. Financial constraints, academic failures and slaps of life also rank high in causing suicides.

And when suicidal thoughts knock on your door never ignore them by saying ‘Suicide? Not me!’ Talk to someone you trust such as a friend or pastor. Never undermine the power of opening up. A problem shared is always half solved. Remember to also pray to keep the evil spirits at bay. And when the thoughts persist think about reasons why you should live and not reasons why you should die!

A DAD, A FATHER AND A MAN

Whenever I looked at my father,
You know what I saw?
I saw a dad.
I insist I saw
I wasn't told, you know.
He was a father in a man.
Further into being a father,
He was a dad.
In the outer world,
A man, he was
But in my world
A dad, a father and a man -
A true one.
At least in my childhood eyes.

C.N. Leakey.

YOU SHAMELESS THIEF, YOU!

By Shiku Ngigi

Yes, you there plotting your next burglary. You are the ever-absent student in class, thief in the hostel. So your parents sent you all the way to this land to steal? Did they labour day and night to send you to the university only for you to metamorphose into a common thief? 

It’s one thing to steal back in village, steal the neighbour’s chicken when they are not looking and have a feast with friends (It is, if you are a ten-year-old with all the time in the world to think of nothing but that). It is yet another thing to call yourself an intellectual and invest your time to devising ways and means of robbing students of their hard-earned belongings. 

You walk into the library and sling a bag over your shoulder as if it belongs to you. A bag you grabbed on one of the racks at the entrance. You break into rooms and grab the first laptop you see. You even wait for the dead of the night to walk out to the clothes lines and make away with people’s wet clothes. You have stooped lower than low.

OK, maybe your parents did not send you here. Maybe you laboured all on your own to make it to this great institution. So what? Did you make all that effort only to reduce yourself into an agent of crime? Oh yes, you are a criminal, just in case you have deluded yourself into thinking you are better than they who do it forcefully. 

Shiku, I am from a poor background. I cannot afford a laptop and neither can my parents, you say. Hold up. I am pretty certain that you are alive because you had some tea and mandazi for breakfast. Also, I am pretty sure you are not naked or out there in the rain. What am I saying? A laptop is not a basic need. Do what you can with what you have. Use it well and your efforts will pay off in the end. 

You might even get a better laptop with better specs than the one you are planning to steal. Laptops are made to expire in as few as three years. This is based on a little maxim we call Moore’s Law. Obsolescence will hit you in the face before you have erased the legal owner’s data. While you are bent on eyeing that poor girl’s laptop in the library (one equipped with 2GB of RAM, 32-bit Windows 7 and 160GB disk space), another bright individual is making ends meet to buy an awesome Core i7, complete with Windows 8, 6 GB RAM and 640GB of disk space).

There is nothing as pathetic as blaming your background for the thief you have become. You are a shameless individual who delights in seeing other people suffer. You reap where you have not sown, akin to the hyena, which waits in the shadows for the lion to make a kill on its behalf. (And by the way, hyenas have been found to hunt for over 50% of their meals. Turns out you are the only real scavenger out here.) Don’t blame your parents. You are old enough to know that what you’re doing is entirely wrong.

It’s also likely that you are stealing laptops for a bigger syndicate in campus. That’s just sad. It gets sadder; that moment it hits you that you are just a minion. You are stealing to enrich the big boss up in your little ‘organization’ while you attain the label thief. It cannot get any sadder than that. 

Meanwhile, we will lock our doors a little tighter, hug our bags a little tighter and keep our eyes peeled for any move you make. You are one of those people who should be banished to Mars or Pluto if it still exists. You can also reform while there’s still time. It’s all up to you. Your days are numbered.