Ndearest Shelii!!!
Shelii I greet you with all my escalating existing and pre-existing problems, oscillating around my new habitat of lone rangers .Shelii since ndeday you deserted me, the gravity of my attraction towards you have been increasingly bulging , systolically and diastolic ally in my heart. Your untimely take off have left a dust of mixed reactions in my eyes.And before it settled down, my roommate has promoted himself into the commander- in -chief of vetting who gets in and out of our room at night. He has even gone a notch higher to deny me my sleeping democracy, by graduating me into the exilic and desperados club. He has even turned our A4 - like spongy mattress into his training field, for his passionate night shift extracurricular activities.
Shelii you are the epicenter of my heart. My life without you has been like a desert. You deserted me before we even implemented agenda item No.4; sharing a dessert together.Shelii you have really injured my lifestyle and reputation, centre- backwards , right-left, under the stipulated Moyii hii relationship Act. You have confined me into the prison of loneliness. My friends are now professing vigeugeu theory, by collaborating with the lies, that we broke our sharing deal agreement because of my alleged third eye for someone else and the rumours have since been spreading in ‘coded message’ like the loliondo magic medicine.
Shelii stop plastering our walls with ‘No strings attached guy...” its starting to inflate my nostrils with an urgent pressure to sneeze out before I spit out. I truly appreciate your extraordinary gift in inventing and manipulating the parameters and mulika mwizi capturing devices on me. But I don’t need Harold Camping’s prophesy to faithfully philosophize around how the end of the road is nigh for you, with or without strings attached. Or have it escaped your mind that our love nest is still recuperating from the August freezing temperatures, after your unannounced and unceremonious short visit to a foreign territory?
Shelii am much at liberty to inform that our results are out and I was not shortlisted by the sup exam review committee, thanx for your mwaks.But forgive me not for my misguided curiosity, after your last transfer window, I could not resist the urge to research and search a photocopy of you, that gal who was in the opposition; a gal with manageable seating allowance, towering front office and full lips. Unfortunately she has already filed two suspicious cases against my romantic maneuvering styles and am waiting for the confirmation hearing, not later than the day you will decide to come back. Never than less she been my constant source of my big smile and heat, even I divorced with my coil which had been for a long time, been a regular source of latent heat.
Shelii before I pipette the last drop of my ink into this paper, I wish to tender my application for another vacancy in your heart. I hope we shall be meeting at the academic junctions; kadunda, mabatani, all chips cafes, soul pit, the newly formed church of gossipers, academic highways, kamukunjis and frustration square.I hereby resign my case in your custody. Yours in Rough.
Shelii lover
Ha ha haaa. This is a nice parody, Shaddy. But is she gonna be moved? Time will tell.
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